Today, I came home and needed to use the phone. It was on the floor of the living room on the cradle, recharging. As I put the receiver to my face, I noticed the distinct odor of coffee. I further noticed that the entire phone was sticky and I looked down at the charger to see a small pool of coffee in the curved inside part. Someone had poured coffee on the phone, enough to cover it and enough to have it pool underneath.
Two possibilities: (1) Mike accidentally spilled coffee on the phone. This is unlikely due to the fact that he would have had to bend down to get coffee precisely on the phone and not on the answering machine next to it, and (2) Mike purposefully poured coffee on my phone. My brother and I have both been away from the house, he for days and myself since yesterday. The coffee had not yet completely dried so it had to have been done today.
If number one is correct, that makes Mike a prick. Anytime you have an accident like that, you clean it up. That's what adults do. If number two is true, that makes Mike a passive-aggressive little bitch. He didn't show up all night so I have to assume that he did something obnoxious like this and then stayed away so as not to face me. Fine, stay away from the house. Your f'ing days are numbered, anyway. Twelve days! Not soon enough!!!!
My first instinct was to go into his room with a pot of coffee and pour it on his bed. I called my brother and he told me to keep calm... just to count the days. He also said I could take solace in the fact that he won't last long in the outside world and that the odds are good that he will get hit by the stupid bus. I contend that the stupid bus ran his retarded ass over and backed up to see what it hit.