Frog's House of Infinite Wisdom

The Smoking Gun has published a report (and delightful picture) of James Brown, who seems to have the same stylist as Nick Nolte. James, stop hitting your wife, ok? Look what it does to your hair!

On a whim, I did a search of "Movie Theater Etiquette" on Google and got a decent list of tips, articles and the like. Here is one such article written by someone that hates you for talking during the movie almost as much as I do!

The New York Post Online Edition has a fantastic picture of Al Franken and an article that claims he "bodyslammed" a heckler at a Dean rally. His reason? Here's his quote:

"I'm neutral in this race but I'm for freedom of speech, which means people should be able to assemble and speak without being shouted down."

No offense, Al, but since when are you allowed to assume the role of bouncer at a rally just because you don't like what someone is saying? What about this guy's right to be heard? Why are YOU allowed to physically assault someone? More importantly, I certainly didn't see you physically go after O'Reilly when HE was talking over you, did I? Naw...

Unless you live under a stump or behind a dumpster with no television, you know about Howard Dean and his wacky "I can name all the states" rant with that otherworldly yelp at the end. Well, enterprising electronic musicians have made music from it and it's pretty damn funny. Click here for "Dean Goes Nuts", a site devoted to the man and his primal scream.

I'm also working on a song as well. Just couldn't help myself! It'll be up soon...

Captain Kangaroo, beloved host of the children's program of the same name, passed away at age 76. First, Mr. Rogers, now this... ugh...

The Globe and Mail is reporting that Jesse Palmer will be the next star of "The Bachelor", that fabulous show where a guy is fawned over by a gaggle of hot ladies and ultimately must pick one to marry. He is currently the backup QB for the Giants, so I guess he's got plenty of time to do this.

The Seattle Times wine adviser Paul Gregutt is singing the praises of the latest trends in wine: the wine "box". Formerly the object of ridicule (by me), the boxed wine is being considered by some of the more credible vineyards because of its transportability and longer shelf life. Bring it on!

Read this:

Some in this chamber, and in our country, did not support the liberation of Iraq. Objections to war often come from principled motives. But let us be candid about the consequences of leaving Saddam Hussein in power. We're seeking all the facts. Already, the Kay Report identified dozens of weapons of mass destruction-related program activities and significant amounts of equipment that Iraq concealed from the United Nations. Had we failed to act, the dictatator's weapons of mass destruction programs would continue to this day. Had we failed to act, Security Council resolutions on Iraq would have been revealed as empty threats, weakening the United Nations and encouraging defiance by dictators around the world. Iraq's torture chambers would still be filled with victims, terrified and innocent. The killing fields of Iraq -- where hundreds of thousands of men and women and children vanished into the sands -- would still be known only to the killers. For all who love freedom and peace, the world without Saddam Hussein's regime is a better and safer place.

Some critics have said our duties in Iraq must be internationalized. This particular criticism is hard to explain to our partners in Britain, Australia, Japan, South Korea, the Philippines, Thailand, Italy, Spain, Poland, Denmark, Hungary, Bulgaria, Ukraine, Romania, the Netherlands -- Norway, El Salvador, and the 17 other countries that have committed troops to Iraq. As we debate at home, we must never ignore the vital contributions of our international partners, or dismiss their sacrifices.

Amen.

Squawk! Where's my bourbon?

The Daily Mirror, a British newspaper, has a great story about the favorite pet of Winston Churchill, a talking parrot. And the great charm of this bird is that even at 104 years old, it can still be coaxed to say a couple of the phrases taught to him by the British leader: "F*** Hitler" and "F*** the Nazis". Read on.

My friends and I were talking about what superpowers we had the other day and this article made me think of it again. I determined that everyone of us has one but that not all of them could be used to fight crime. Think about it... if anyone saw "X2", they saw that kid who could change the channels on TV without using the remote. That's his power. He's never be able to fight crime with that power, unless the crime is "cable theft".

Anyway, I determined that my girlfriend's power is that no matter what city she's in, she automatically knows all the channels on the local cable system, especially ESPN.

My friend Jim can convert vast quantities of rum into urine.

My power is that I can summon the stupidest people in the area to immediately drive to a 4 way stop when I'm there and just stare at me, dumbfounded.

What superpowers do you guys have?

Netscape.com has a delightful selection of strange but true warning labels for your amusement. Most of them defy logic but are there to make sure the companies that create them don't get sued because some idiot didn't realize that their shin pads "cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover".

Now and forever... or at least when I decide to put it on the air... instead of having to check other sites, here's the deal. The URL is: http://frogbrother.hopto.org:8080. Just put that in iTunes (or change the "http:" to an "icy:" and put it into Quicktime) and it should load right up... usually it's on while I'm at work. Try it out and see...

Ah, the mysteries of life. Take this story from Yahoo.com. It's reporting that David Albury, a NASCAR fan from Deland noticed that his black and white tabby had a fur pattern that resembled the number 3, which represents Dale Earnhardt. His response? "We're rich!"

Note the "Hurricanes" hat. Your honor, I rest my case. Thanks, Greg.

My buddy at >BrainTerminal.com has written a great article that gives advice on how to prevent your email from getting filled with unwanted penis enlargement and mortgage emails. Take a look. It gets into the tricks that the spammers use to aquire new victims.

Check out this story. Seems this precocious 7 year old wanted a stuffed animal so bad he decided to crawl inside the machine to get it. After spending $7 in quarters, the father decided to call 911...

Ooooo... that hairy chest... ooooh, those chicken legs...

Amazon.com has the album "Looking For-Best of David Hasselhoff" on their website and it would seem there are some huge fans of the album out there! Here's one:

Get down on your knees and thank the Maker for allowing you to experience this transcendentally magnificent album! Your ears are kissed by the fire of Prometheus each time you listen to the blessed tones of "Dance Dance D'amour." Your feet are bathed and your hair is soaked in flower water each time the song "Freedom For the World" is piped through your cassette deck. The hammer of Thor comes slamming down onto your crotch each time "Hot Shot City" is particularly playing on the radio. And your heart leaps over hurdles on the racetrack of life every time David Hockaloogie trills his voice- a voice that sounds like four ferrets trapped in a rusty hamper.

The song "Hot Shot City" is particularly good.

In Dale City, Virginia, police are on the lookout for thugs who assaulted a man who had the NERVE to ask them to shut the &*%$ up during a showing of "Lord of the Rings". Apparently, they were yapping, he asked them to be quiet twice and they, in turn, knocked the soda out of his hand, put him in a headlock, beat on him and ran off.

In a story that's surely going to make me throw up in my mouth, TheSanDiegoChannel.com is reporting a terrifying story about a woman whose reaction to medication caused her skin to begin sloughing off.

Erp. Eeeerrrrrp.

Excuse me.

This includes all of the membranes surrounding her... burrp... internal organs... (sputter)...

Never mind. You better read it yourself.

ABCNEWS.com reported yesterday that Hillary Clinton, during a fundraising speech, introduced a quote from Ghandhi by prefacing that he was known for running "a gas station down in St. Louis". Get it? Gas station? Indian?

Anyway, it would seem that she is being given the benefit of the doubt for this very insensitive faux pas, which would be ok if the same treatment was given to conservatives who make the same type of verbal gaff. Hypocracy strikes again!

Don't worry, guys... she's trying to get it annulled... Saturday night was made for love as Britney married her childhood friend, Jason Alexander. No, not the guy from Seinfeld, I don't think. Click here.